Join the Scrunchie revolution!

So when I was using my phone, I'm hit with this incredible idea.

I have the greatest idea for the next-gen form of communication. So, let's have a quick review of how long range communication has been handled for the average man on the street.

Let's not go all the way back to smoke signals and what not, because 1) I'm lazy to type so much and 2) I have no fucking idea what came after the smoke signals =)

So, we started with the radical invention of the house phone. People could call each other and talk to each other even though they were very far apart. Then we progressed to the internet. ICQ became the new fad, and it was easy to chat with anybody else who was online as well. Much cheaper than actually calling someone. MSN messenger and what not followed. Then, the SMS was invented. Basically, MSN on a phone, albeit it costs money to send a message to someone, and you could send it to anybody (MSN - only if he was online).

Now, it is evident that as time passes, humans have more and more time on their hands. A conversation that took about 5 minutes on the phone could take up to about 10 or 15 minutes on MSN. A 10 to 15 MSN conversation could then take up to about half an hour or more through SMS. Isin't it ingenious? Now nobody could complain about boredom or having excess of time. (Except for the friendless few, but let's not go into that shall we =)

So, extrapolating from this trend, it is extremely obvious what our next form of communication will be. From bulky house phones we have now shrunk them into the extremely portable handphones we have today. So, the next invention must be smaller still, how about a small cube that can be worn as a pendant on a necklace?

Of course, this invention should be thought-controlled to make it more convenient. Now, as we all know, if you could just think of what to say and then immediately send it to the person you want to, there would be too much of extra time on everybody's hands. So, to remedy this, one must hold the cube, scrunch up his face in concentration, and concentrate on a letter.

Let's say he wants to say, "Hello, how are you?" So, he would have to concentrate on the letter H for a few seconds, then it would appear on a thought-screen in front of his eyes. Rinse and repeat for the following letters needed to complete the sentence. Thus, due to the amount of concentration needed, and the scrunched up expression of concentrating, I have dubbed this invention, the Scrunchie.

Now it would take even longer to have a conversation through Scrunchie-ing compared to SMS-es and what not. Even now, anywhere you go, you can see people happily typing away on their phones, thinking "Great, now I won't have any excess times on my hands" , taking about 2 hours to have a nice conversation. Imagine when Scrunchie is released on to the market. Half the people we see will be walking around with a scrunched up face on their face, and since it takes so long to send a message, they'll probably be in that state for more than half the day.

The genius of it doesn't stop there. When one receives a SMS, a tune-of-your-choice comes blaring out, invoking jealous stares from people around you, so that you may bask in the glory that you have friends who SMS them, and they don't. Of course, there is a rather silly option of silencing your phone, but then, how else would you be able to proclaim to the rest of the world you have friends?

So when one receives a Scrunchie, the receiving person shall start squawking like a bird or any animal of choice, since the majority of people are shitty singers, and would not be able to emulate the current pop song. Now, you can squawk it out to the world "LOOK I GOT A SCRUNCHIE YOU FRIENDLESS LOSERS". Excellent.

And when the older generation looks in bewilderment at the people with scrunched up faces, and people squawking away, you can give them a snooty harrumph, and tell them they're so outdated.

Seriously, Scrunchies are made of win.

Now if only I could get my idea sold to Nokia. Hmmm.